(CNN) -- It's a situation no one wants to be in: staring at the serene face of a loved one as doctors discuss ventilators, feeding tubes and EEG results, wondering whether this is what your mom or brother or spouse really would have wanted. The heartbreaking story of 13-year-old Jahi McMath has made many question what they would do in a similar situation.
In one California study (PDF), 84% of the people surveyed said their loved ones had a good idea of or knew their wishes exactly, yet only 29% had ever had a serious, in-depth conversation about end-of-life care.
"It's awkward," said Paul Malley, president of Aging with Dignity. "People think, 'I don't need to do that today.' There's that assumption that you only need to talk about end-of-life care if you're old and sick. These cases that have played out in the news show it's just the opposite."
The hardest conversation ~ Here are five things you need to do now:
1. Find someone to speak for you
2. Determine what you want -- and what you don't
3. Write it down
4. Know your state's laws
5. Think about more than the medicine
Use this toolkit from the American Bar Association (PDF) to help guide your wishes. Know that it's not possible to address every situation, and many experts warn against making your mandates too broad.
http://apps.americanbar.org/aging/publicat...
Posted By: Jen Fad
Saturday, February 1st 2014 at 2:11PM
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